Wednesday, April 29, 2015

I stood someone up, oh the shame :-(

I experienced a mortifying experience this afternoon when I totally and unintentionally stood someone up for the first time in my life!

I am so embarrassed.

But she was so cool and understanding. She even told me to not let it ruin my day.

We rescheduled and seems like all is well in the end.

But I learned a few things.


#1. I got stood up a couple times in my life. One was with a potential client and the other with someone I was interviewing as a nanny. It wasn't great. I felt like they didn't respect me or my time. I didn't get mad, but it was annoying. Well, now I have been in those shoes. I have a first hand experience at how it can happen. It is true, the best way to learn another's experience is to walk a mile in their shoes.

#2. I should not (and will not) make plans weeks in advance. Even with my smart phone calendar, my brain did not act smart today. I am really a day-to-day kinda gal. Maybe I can handle a week in advance!? Haha! I need some life hacks to be able to make plans way ahead of time. I'm thinking detailed notes in my calendar and multiple reminders leading up to the commitment.

#3. Honesty is the best policy. I could have made up some sob story about why I didn't show up. But I didn't. In University I told a few fibs to profs just to get some sympathy for missed classes (even when my reason for being absent would have been totally valid, but for some reason I felt I needed something more dramatic). Anyways, I didn't lie today. I let myself be totally vulnerable and to feel the shame and embarrassment. I did share a bit of what had happened in my day that had led me to make such a blunder, but I didn't want to excuse it away. And I sincerely apologized. It felt right to sit with those emotions, but then I was able to get out of the rut. Maybe if I had lied, I would have continued to feel bad and the person I stood up would have felt the lie and felt even more annoyed and maybe even betrayed. It was an awesome learning opportunity for my kids too. They saw their Mama make a big mistake. I like when life gives me the chance to show my kids that even grownups make mistakes. But most importantly, for them to see how to own the mistake and problem solve after.

I hope when we meet up next week we can have a laugh about this and I'll be able to make it up by buying lunch :-)

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